In the past few months (yes, that's about how long it takes me to finish a book) I read the book Desire by John Elderedge. It was recommended to me by a friend and it has been instrumental in my life. Everything's new right now. I'm in the same city but completely on my own for the first time. I love it! This season the Lords been revealing who I am in Him. Revealing to me the exact person He created me to be. This book has lead me to deeper examine my heart, embrace my desires, and fully trust Him to fulfill them! I could elaborate for hours on what the Lord has spoken to me, but instead I'll just share some wisdom from this book.
"We abandon the most important journey of our lives when we abandon desire."
"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life." Proverbs 13:12
"A desire fulfilled is sweet to the soul..." Proverbs 13:19
"the thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly."
John 10:10
"You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore." Psalm 16:11
"Those who know their desire and refuse to kill it, or refuse to act as though they don’t need help,they are the ones who live by faith. Those who do not ask do not trust God enough to desire."
"We hide our true desire and call it maturity. Jesus is not impressed. He points to the less sophisticated attitude of a child as a better way to live."
"We come into the world longing,” says Gil Bailie, “for we know not what. We are desire. And desire is good, for it’s what takes us to God. But our desire is not hard-wired to God.”
"The evil one has basically two ploys. If he cannot get us to kill our hearts and bury our desire, then he is delighted to seduce our desire into a trap. Once we give over our desire for life to any object than God then we become ensnared."
"God has “set eternity” in our hearts (Eccl. 3:11 NIV). Where in our hearts? In our desires."
"Your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven. (Matthew 6:10 ESV)"
***our desires as believers is for things on this earth to be as they are in heaven. For there to be peace, love, hope, health etc. here on earth. ***
"As Christians, we have a new heart, and that means nothing less than this: our core desires are good."
"But once we know what we want, we must learn the grace of release."
For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
Romans 8:22-25
"To wait is to learn the spiritual grace of detachment, the freedom of desire. Not the absence of desire, but desire at rest."
"We must bring the truth into our hearts to guard and to guide our desire;"
I know this was a lot of quotes, but these are the main points that led me along this journey. The beginning prompted me to list out my desires, to not be ashamed or embarrassed by them but rather to embrace them and walk in freedom of who God made me to be. The second part led me to a deeper trust in God and His perfect and faithful timing for fulfilling my desires.
I share all of this in hopes that everyone who reads this embarks on the journey that I have been on. I HIGHLY recommend reading the book if you can, but if not just spend time at the feet of God, resting in His presence as He reveals to you exactly who He created you be! Ultimately knowing, your supreme purpose is to bring Glory to our Great God!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
San Diego
As I start most of my blogs, where to begin is the question? A few weeks ago I was blessed with a sweet gift from God, a getaway trip to San Diego to see a "life" friend (yes, this is what we call each other, simply because we experience Jesus and life together), Mallie!
It all started with a text saying "wanna come to San Diego these dates?" to which I immediately said yes please. And within 2 weeks I was headed out west! Now why San Diego you might ask, reason #1 would be to see Mallie and reason #2 would be to spend time with the Phelan family!
A little background, the past 2 summers Mallie has lived with the Phelans for a month. Bradford and Stephen are two AL natives that the Lord specifically called to share the gospel and be his hands and feet in inner city San Diego. Stephen is the pastor of Harbor Mid City Church (check out the website http://www.harbormidcity.org/). Bradford is a hardworking mom of three: Ford, Mille, and Virginia Grace and Stephen's greatest asset and partner in ministry! When I lived in LA last fall I spent a weekend with the Phelans and was incredibly blessed by seeing how they glorify Christ in everyday life. So for multiple reasons I was thrilled to have the opportunity to spend time with some great people!!
Saturday was lots of fun! I went sailing for the first time! What a blast. The Phelans next door neighbor took Mallie and I on a sailing tour of San Diego bay! It was incredible! We saw the naval base, Cornado bridge, and the seals! Believe it or not, they were even crazy enough to let me steer for a minute!
Saturday night we celebrated Bradfords birthday in the Gas Lamp District of San Diego, at a super trendy new restaurant called Searsucker (yep, we loved the southern name!)
Sunday we went to church and then came home and had Friendship Club! This is a group of 8-12 year olds that the Lord called Bradford to reach out to. What was really cool about Gods timing of my 2 visits to the Phelans was that last fall when I visited the Friendship Club's first meeting was a sleepover so I got to spend time with the girls. Then to go back later and spend time with the same girls was a treat! Bradford had asked that I share the message and I decided to share with the girls the story of Rahab. Didn't quite highlight the fact that she was a prostitute, but shared the fact that she wasn't a Jew but acknowledged that the God of he Israelites was the one true God. From that confession of who God was, He used her as a part of the plan to give the Israelites possession of the town of Jericho. And another cool thing about Rahab is the if you look in Matthew 1 she is in the lineage of Jesus! Wow! What a beautiful picture of the fact that God is Sovereign and chooses to uses broken sinners for His greater purpose and to bring Him glory!! Isn't He great?
If I have one thing to share with any girl in this world, I would want them to know that they are specifically and uniquely CHOSEN by the Creator and King of the universe. So our memory verse was Isaiah 43:1 "...I have called you by name, you are mine".
Monday morning we were able to spend the morning with a neighbor across the street who is bed bound. This woman has been in a bed for the past 3 years and she has a dear son who cares for her day in and day out. Maria had told Bradford and Mallie that she wanted a haircut. So Mallie cut Maria's hair and I read her scripture. She lights up when people read the Bible to her. I also showed her son a few OT techniques to keep her from getting ulcers from laying 24/7. Maria also prayed with Mallie and I for a long time. This was truly a HUGE blessing for her to speak scripture over our lives. Everything she said was prophetic, speaking truth into our lives about what God had been doing in our lives individually. God had been laying on my heart the importance of being intentional in memorizing His word. Maria had psalm 103 completely memorized it and multiple times during our few hours with her she repeated
It all started with a text saying "wanna come to San Diego these dates?" to which I immediately said yes please. And within 2 weeks I was headed out west! Now why San Diego you might ask, reason #1 would be to see Mallie and reason #2 would be to spend time with the Phelan family!
A little background, the past 2 summers Mallie has lived with the Phelans for a month. Bradford and Stephen are two AL natives that the Lord specifically called to share the gospel and be his hands and feet in inner city San Diego. Stephen is the pastor of Harbor Mid City Church (check out the website http://www.harbormidcity.org/). Bradford is a hardworking mom of three: Ford, Mille, and Virginia Grace and Stephen's greatest asset and partner in ministry! When I lived in LA last fall I spent a weekend with the Phelans and was incredibly blessed by seeing how they glorify Christ in everyday life. So for multiple reasons I was thrilled to have the opportunity to spend time with some great people!!
Saturday was lots of fun! I went sailing for the first time! What a blast. The Phelans next door neighbor took Mallie and I on a sailing tour of San Diego bay! It was incredible! We saw the naval base, Cornado bridge, and the seals! Believe it or not, they were even crazy enough to let me steer for a minute!
Saturday night we celebrated Bradfords birthday in the Gas Lamp District of San Diego, at a super trendy new restaurant called Searsucker (yep, we loved the southern name!)
Sunday we went to church and then came home and had Friendship Club! This is a group of 8-12 year olds that the Lord called Bradford to reach out to. What was really cool about Gods timing of my 2 visits to the Phelans was that last fall when I visited the Friendship Club's first meeting was a sleepover so I got to spend time with the girls. Then to go back later and spend time with the same girls was a treat! Bradford had asked that I share the message and I decided to share with the girls the story of Rahab. Didn't quite highlight the fact that she was a prostitute, but shared the fact that she wasn't a Jew but acknowledged that the God of he Israelites was the one true God. From that confession of who God was, He used her as a part of the plan to give the Israelites possession of the town of Jericho. And another cool thing about Rahab is the if you look in Matthew 1 she is in the lineage of Jesus! Wow! What a beautiful picture of the fact that God is Sovereign and chooses to uses broken sinners for His greater purpose and to bring Him glory!! Isn't He great?
If I have one thing to share with any girl in this world, I would want them to know that they are specifically and uniquely CHOSEN by the Creator and King of the universe. So our memory verse was Isaiah 43:1 "...I have called you by name, you are mine".
Monday morning we were able to spend the morning with a neighbor across the street who is bed bound. This woman has been in a bed for the past 3 years and she has a dear son who cares for her day in and day out. Maria had told Bradford and Mallie that she wanted a haircut. So Mallie cut Maria's hair and I read her scripture. She lights up when people read the Bible to her. I also showed her son a few OT techniques to keep her from getting ulcers from laying 24/7. Maria also prayed with Mallie and I for a long time. This was truly a HUGE blessing for her to speak scripture over our lives. Everything she said was prophetic, speaking truth into our lives about what God had been doing in our lives individually. God had been laying on my heart the importance of being intentional in memorizing His word. Maria had psalm 103 completely memorized it and multiple times during our few hours with her she repeated
Friday, March 30, 2012
Deer Valley
Last week I had the incredible opportunity of going to Deer Valley, Utah and being a extra set of hands/babysitter for three precious families. The trip was AWESOME, to say the least! When my plane landed in Salt Lake City it was snowing! Such a change from the 86 degree weather when I left Birmingham! A much welcomed change; however because I basically have missed winter in the south. Spending all but 5 days of the month of January in the Caribbean left me missing cold weather just a bit! I arrived late Sunday night and hit the ski slopes bright and early Monday morning!
Apparently these families are the best vacation planners in the world because during first 2 days of the trip, Deer Valley had the best snow of all season! Much to my surprise, after not skiing for 7 years I could still manage. Now I would still consider myself an advanced beginner, thus I stuck to the green and a few blue slopes but I couldn't have enjoyed it more!!! In fact, I actually improved my skiing a little bit. I've alway been a "pizza" skier which is the most basic skill level, but this trip I challenged myself and tried to become a "French fry" skier. If you don't ski these terms are foreign, but if you do you can laugh at how pathetic it is that I'm 24 and just learning "French fries." Anywho, I would now venture to say that I'm an official French fryer haha. That sure doesn't mean I was tackling the black diamonds but the last afternoon our last run was the longest on the mountain, 2 miles and a double blue and by the grace of God I didn't fall and break my neck!
I loved getting to spend time with each of the 8 kiddos and their parents. To see each of the children's personalities and giftings truly blessed me. God has great things in store for each of them, each and every kid so different and unique! Praise God for personality and creating each of the in His image. Each and every one of them has something to bring to this world that no one else can share! I pray that as they grow older that the walk with Him and seek His kingdom first!
Now for a few incredible pics of the trip!!
Apparently these families are the best vacation planners in the world because during first 2 days of the trip, Deer Valley had the best snow of all season! Much to my surprise, after not skiing for 7 years I could still manage. Now I would still consider myself an advanced beginner, thus I stuck to the green and a few blue slopes but I couldn't have enjoyed it more!!! In fact, I actually improved my skiing a little bit. I've alway been a "pizza" skier which is the most basic skill level, but this trip I challenged myself and tried to become a "French fry" skier. If you don't ski these terms are foreign, but if you do you can laugh at how pathetic it is that I'm 24 and just learning "French fries." Anywho, I would now venture to say that I'm an official French fryer haha. That sure doesn't mean I was tackling the black diamonds but the last afternoon our last run was the longest on the mountain, 2 miles and a double blue and by the grace of God I didn't fall and break my neck!
I loved getting to spend time with each of the 8 kiddos and their parents. To see each of the children's personalities and giftings truly blessed me. God has great things in store for each of them, each and every kid so different and unique! Praise God for personality and creating each of the in His image. Each and every one of them has something to bring to this world that no one else can share! I pray that as they grow older that the walk with Him and seek His kingdom first!
Now for a few incredible pics of the trip!!
Saturday, March 10, 2012
The Tough Times
Recently, I've had the privilege to labor with two dear friends through some real battles. Battles that aren't fun, that aren't easy, and quite honestly just don't seem fair. My heart breaks for these two friends, but rejoices in how God is using them to teach me!
These incredible women, as down in the dumps as their lives are, inspire me. Why, you might ask? It's because of their hearts for the Lord. They trust in God even when He hasn't given them the answers or healing, that is He hasn't YET! Also, they are just down right real. They don't deny the fact that things aren't great right now, they are vulnerable and honest about their struggles. This level of vulnerability has truly blessed me because it's what Christ desires. He blessed us with the fellowship of the saints so that we could lean on each other when we aren't strong. Yes, I know that's a song,but really y'all we can't live this life alone we NEED our brothers and sisters in Christ. They are the ones who speak life and truth to us and believe in God to be who He promises He will be, even when we can't.
These women have also challenged me and through them the Lord has revealed my sinful little self to me. He's refining me. Hallelujah! He had revealed that I am wayyyyyy to independent. I don't like to have help and don't like to let people know I need them. I'm really good at carry other peoples burdens and struggles but terrible when it comes to opening up and letting others extend love and grace to me in my times of doubt and weakness. Praise God He is dealing with me on this matter. This type of worldly independence can also be seen in my relationship with God. I don't rely and turn to Him enough. I try to do it on my own rather than submitting and seeking the face of my precious Father for EVERYTHING. Please pray for me as God changes my independence to dependence!
Also, in one of my conversations with one of these two dear friends the Lord brought to mind a truth what I want to share with you readers. My friend was expressing how she felt bad telling God about her pain and anguish when she knew that so many people in the world were going through harder trials than she. She also said I know that I am supposed to rejoice in all circumstances and I'm really trying but I just don't feel like I am. Immediately when she this the Lord so sweetly reminded me that far to often we thinking of rejoicing incorrectly. Rejoicing is a form of joy. But JOY isn't the same thing as happiness. Joy isn't reflected in a smile, happiness is. I like the following definition of joy.
Joy: the deep, settled confidence that God is in control.
You see my friend has been rejoicing through her trials, she just needed to be reminded that joy isn't dependent upon whether not not she has a smile on her face, rather is dependent on her heart. And let me just tell you, I'll be the first to say that her heart is beautiful. As I speak to her she doesn't stop proclaiming who God is and what His promises are to her. This girl has got faith to move the mountains, and her openness with all around her is bringing God so much glory it's incredible!
I'll end by again saying thank you to my precious friends for allowing me to journey with them through the tough times and praising God for making me daily more dependent upon others and more importantly upon Him!
These incredible women, as down in the dumps as their lives are, inspire me. Why, you might ask? It's because of their hearts for the Lord. They trust in God even when He hasn't given them the answers or healing, that is He hasn't YET! Also, they are just down right real. They don't deny the fact that things aren't great right now, they are vulnerable and honest about their struggles. This level of vulnerability has truly blessed me because it's what Christ desires. He blessed us with the fellowship of the saints so that we could lean on each other when we aren't strong. Yes, I know that's a song,but really y'all we can't live this life alone we NEED our brothers and sisters in Christ. They are the ones who speak life and truth to us and believe in God to be who He promises He will be, even when we can't.
These women have also challenged me and through them the Lord has revealed my sinful little self to me. He's refining me. Hallelujah! He had revealed that I am wayyyyyy to independent. I don't like to have help and don't like to let people know I need them. I'm really good at carry other peoples burdens and struggles but terrible when it comes to opening up and letting others extend love and grace to me in my times of doubt and weakness. Praise God He is dealing with me on this matter. This type of worldly independence can also be seen in my relationship with God. I don't rely and turn to Him enough. I try to do it on my own rather than submitting and seeking the face of my precious Father for EVERYTHING. Please pray for me as God changes my independence to dependence!
Also, in one of my conversations with one of these two dear friends the Lord brought to mind a truth what I want to share with you readers. My friend was expressing how she felt bad telling God about her pain and anguish when she knew that so many people in the world were going through harder trials than she. She also said I know that I am supposed to rejoice in all circumstances and I'm really trying but I just don't feel like I am. Immediately when she this the Lord so sweetly reminded me that far to often we thinking of rejoicing incorrectly. Rejoicing is a form of joy. But JOY isn't the same thing as happiness. Joy isn't reflected in a smile, happiness is. I like the following definition of joy.
Joy: the deep, settled confidence that God is in control.
You see my friend has been rejoicing through her trials, she just needed to be reminded that joy isn't dependent upon whether not not she has a smile on her face, rather is dependent on her heart. And let me just tell you, I'll be the first to say that her heart is beautiful. As I speak to her she doesn't stop proclaiming who God is and what His promises are to her. This girl has got faith to move the mountains, and her openness with all around her is bringing God so much glory it's incredible!
I'll end by again saying thank you to my precious friends for allowing me to journey with them through the tough times and praising God for making me daily more dependent upon others and more importantly upon Him!
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Making a joyful noise!
The people of Haiti have making a joyful noise down to a tee. While staying at the compound there is rarely ever an hour where you don't hear people singing. While in Haiti I have the absolute best alarm: about 200 kids singing at 7 am! The kids report to school at 7 and sing in the courtyard for 30 minutes before class starts at 7:30. Below are two videos of their beautiful voices.
This song is sung each morning as they raise the flag!
The song I typically woke up too!
Hope you enjoyed being serenaded! I know I sure miss it!
This song is sung each morning as they raise the flag!
The song I typically woke up too!
Hope you enjoyed being serenaded! I know I sure miss it!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
I miss it!
If you know me and where I spent that past 2 1/2 weeks you will know where IT is, but in case you need help: HAITI! I literally miss everything about it. Since I've been back in the US I've been able to spend a weekend with my sweet college friends, go to an engagement party of one of my old/soon to be new roommates, went to a super bowl party, interviewed and have been offered a job, and gone home to Brentwood to see my family and especially my sweet Granny who had surgery while I was in Haiti. It's been wonderful, but I still love Haiti and my heart is still there!
After getting to my car in Atlanta to go to the mountains with my friends, I had a strange feeling for the first time in my life. I've been to Haiti 4 times now, but this time coming home was different. Driving through downtown Atlanta and seeing all the skyscrapers, millions of lights, and all the stuff in America, I felt like a foreigner. Many of you are wondering how I could feel like a foreigner in the country of my birth, it baffled me too. But really it just confirmed in my heart (once again) that the nation of Haiti will play a huge role in my future. My heart delights in this reality and is expectant of the Lords timing and beauty of what that will look like. I yearn for Him alone to orchestrate this!
Now back to what I miss! Well, besides everything, I'll list a few. I miss waking up to 200 kids singing praises to God in Creole. I miss sleeping under a mosquito net on an air mattress! Crazy, I know! But seriously I slept better in Haiti than I did the first 3 nights I was in America! I miss The Pierre family. This was the sweet family that lived below us in the compound. Alot of nights I went downstairs and visited with the kids and parents. I did dishes with Yslande, played on the iPad with Woodley (he was really good at angry birds, playing every rap song in my music-which wasn't many!, loved photo booth, and finding the We are the World song that was recorded by many artists in America after the earthquake), skipped with Darling, and learned creole from Pierre and his wife. I miss holding all the little children. I miss dancing with them. I miss painting there nails and telling them they are beautiful. I miss them touching my hair and skin out of curiosity. I miss them braiding my hair and running up to me with such joy and excitement. I miss the community that I found out the compound where we stayed. Three different groups of people besides ourselves were working with HOM while we stayed. Being in community with other believers that we're like minded blessed me so much. To hear of their life stories, their walks with God, to glean wisdom from many of them, to see theie hard work and dedication, to watch Jesus shine through them and use them to bless those around them, blessed me. To see people my age and younger committing months of there lives to serve God encouraged me. I miss the bumpy roads. I miss rice and beans. Weird I know. But seriously, I like them and might have to learn how to cook a little like the Haitians. I miss the sunshine, the sunsets, and the one sunrise I woke up early enough to watch. I miss being exposed to the reality of how the Haitians live. This reality kept me constantly praying and seeking the goodness of the Lord to come and reign. I pleaded with God to be exactly who He says He is in His word. Knowing that He is faithful and sovereign. I miss my heart being broken for the children of God I saw around me. More than ever before I feel that this trip my heart was broken for what breaks His. But in that brokenness it lead me to recall the greatness of Him the Maker and Creator of all things!
Being back in America has been a harder transition than ever before. Like I said, makes no sense because I've busy visiting with people I love and care for, but my heart yearns to be in Haiti. I truly feel like it's a place I can call home. Wrestling with this isnt easy, but it's good. Because God has been and will continue to be so faithful to walk me through this transition. He has reminded me that since Friday He has me in the US until He calls me elsewhere. So today I am called to live in this society, to love the people here with every bit of who I am, to serve Him in America, to listen and seek Him the exact same, to trust Him for provision and wisdom, and to let my little light shine today exactly where He has me.....but that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to miss Haiti!
After getting to my car in Atlanta to go to the mountains with my friends, I had a strange feeling for the first time in my life. I've been to Haiti 4 times now, but this time coming home was different. Driving through downtown Atlanta and seeing all the skyscrapers, millions of lights, and all the stuff in America, I felt like a foreigner. Many of you are wondering how I could feel like a foreigner in the country of my birth, it baffled me too. But really it just confirmed in my heart (once again) that the nation of Haiti will play a huge role in my future. My heart delights in this reality and is expectant of the Lords timing and beauty of what that will look like. I yearn for Him alone to orchestrate this!
Now back to what I miss! Well, besides everything, I'll list a few. I miss waking up to 200 kids singing praises to God in Creole. I miss sleeping under a mosquito net on an air mattress! Crazy, I know! But seriously I slept better in Haiti than I did the first 3 nights I was in America! I miss The Pierre family. This was the sweet family that lived below us in the compound. Alot of nights I went downstairs and visited with the kids and parents. I did dishes with Yslande, played on the iPad with Woodley (he was really good at angry birds, playing every rap song in my music-which wasn't many!, loved photo booth, and finding the We are the World song that was recorded by many artists in America after the earthquake), skipped with Darling, and learned creole from Pierre and his wife. I miss holding all the little children. I miss dancing with them. I miss painting there nails and telling them they are beautiful. I miss them touching my hair and skin out of curiosity. I miss them braiding my hair and running up to me with such joy and excitement. I miss the community that I found out the compound where we stayed. Three different groups of people besides ourselves were working with HOM while we stayed. Being in community with other believers that we're like minded blessed me so much. To hear of their life stories, their walks with God, to glean wisdom from many of them, to see theie hard work and dedication, to watch Jesus shine through them and use them to bless those around them, blessed me. To see people my age and younger committing months of there lives to serve God encouraged me. I miss the bumpy roads. I miss rice and beans. Weird I know. But seriously, I like them and might have to learn how to cook a little like the Haitians. I miss the sunshine, the sunsets, and the one sunrise I woke up early enough to watch. I miss being exposed to the reality of how the Haitians live. This reality kept me constantly praying and seeking the goodness of the Lord to come and reign. I pleaded with God to be exactly who He says He is in His word. Knowing that He is faithful and sovereign. I miss my heart being broken for the children of God I saw around me. More than ever before I feel that this trip my heart was broken for what breaks His. But in that brokenness it lead me to recall the greatness of Him the Maker and Creator of all things!
Being back in America has been a harder transition than ever before. Like I said, makes no sense because I've busy visiting with people I love and care for, but my heart yearns to be in Haiti. I truly feel like it's a place I can call home. Wrestling with this isnt easy, but it's good. Because God has been and will continue to be so faithful to walk me through this transition. He has reminded me that since Friday He has me in the US until He calls me elsewhere. So today I am called to live in this society, to love the people here with every bit of who I am, to serve Him in America, to listen and seek Him the exact same, to trust Him for provision and wisdom, and to let my little light shine today exactly where He has me.....but that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to miss Haiti!
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Only One Week Left
My, oh, my, how time flies. I wish I had magical powers to slow it down. Since the last blog I've done some construction work and helped out at the City Soleil health clinic.
We spent one day building the walls and windows of a house for a family currently living in a tent. When I get home I promise to upload photos from the before and after. It's incredible to see the hand of God in something as simple as giving a family a safe and solid roof over there head. I was moved by the following verse that day.
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings. (Isaiah 58:12b NIV)
What a joy it is to join with the Lord's work in the lives of these Haitians! This is the kind of stuff that makes my heart sing!
The past three days Katy and I have been working with an awesome team from Raleigh, North Carolina at the newly built HOM medical clinic. We tagged along just hoping to observe how everything works and soon found ourselves plugged into some of the action. Most would say we had the least desirable job however I have enjoyed every minute of it. We were put in charge of doing all the urine analysis, blood sugar, and pregnancy testing. I now consider myself a professional urine analyzer seeing as how I've completed over 200 and the week is not over yet!
This week has been a struggle emotionally. To see people in such dire need of medical care is heart wrenching, especially knowing that some of the ailments could be prevented by basic health education and access to medications. On Tuesday, we sent 4 people straight to the hospital they were so unstable. Sadly, we still don't know how they are, but trust God with their lives.
One child we saw had hydrocephalus and his head was very enlarged. In America this can be fixed by running a shunt from the brain to the stomach to decrease the fluid build up around the brain. But in Haiti without the financial resources this child won't be helped, and even if finances weren't an issue finding a doctor who can perform the surgery would be difficult also.
The thing that really tugged on my heart strings would be telling the women they were pregnant. Tears were shed on both their part and mine. I can't imagine all the thoughts running through their heads about how they would care for the child, feed the child, and I'm sure millions more. With each new positive pregnancy test I pleaded with the Lord for joy, peace, and rest to reign the hearts of the mom and that she be free from anxiety about the upcoming birth of her child. I know God specifically orchestrated that woman to be the momma of the child in her womb and has great plans for the life of that precious baby.
On Tuesday the pediatrician as saw one little boy that was dehydrated. A nurse, his mother, and I tried to get fluids into his little body with a syringe one drop at a time. Only to have him throw it all up 30 minutes later. The pediatrician sent the mom home with fluids and instructed her to continue throughout that night to give him liquids and if he didn't get better to take him to the hospital the next morning. Praise be to God about 8:30 the next morning the mom and her little boy showed up at our clinic and he was doing much better and the mom came to tell the doctor and say thank you. It was neat to see some follow up because the majority of the week the the doctors see the patient give them anywhere from 3 to 6 medications and off they go.
About to go on an motorcycle adventure around Port Au Prince, so until next time.
We spent one day building the walls and windows of a house for a family currently living in a tent. When I get home I promise to upload photos from the before and after. It's incredible to see the hand of God in something as simple as giving a family a safe and solid roof over there head. I was moved by the following verse that day.
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings. (Isaiah 58:12b NIV)
What a joy it is to join with the Lord's work in the lives of these Haitians! This is the kind of stuff that makes my heart sing!
The past three days Katy and I have been working with an awesome team from Raleigh, North Carolina at the newly built HOM medical clinic. We tagged along just hoping to observe how everything works and soon found ourselves plugged into some of the action. Most would say we had the least desirable job however I have enjoyed every minute of it. We were put in charge of doing all the urine analysis, blood sugar, and pregnancy testing. I now consider myself a professional urine analyzer seeing as how I've completed over 200 and the week is not over yet!
This week has been a struggle emotionally. To see people in such dire need of medical care is heart wrenching, especially knowing that some of the ailments could be prevented by basic health education and access to medications. On Tuesday, we sent 4 people straight to the hospital they were so unstable. Sadly, we still don't know how they are, but trust God with their lives.
One child we saw had hydrocephalus and his head was very enlarged. In America this can be fixed by running a shunt from the brain to the stomach to decrease the fluid build up around the brain. But in Haiti without the financial resources this child won't be helped, and even if finances weren't an issue finding a doctor who can perform the surgery would be difficult also.
The thing that really tugged on my heart strings would be telling the women they were pregnant. Tears were shed on both their part and mine. I can't imagine all the thoughts running through their heads about how they would care for the child, feed the child, and I'm sure millions more. With each new positive pregnancy test I pleaded with the Lord for joy, peace, and rest to reign the hearts of the mom and that she be free from anxiety about the upcoming birth of her child. I know God specifically orchestrated that woman to be the momma of the child in her womb and has great plans for the life of that precious baby.
On Tuesday the pediatrician as saw one little boy that was dehydrated. A nurse, his mother, and I tried to get fluids into his little body with a syringe one drop at a time. Only to have him throw it all up 30 minutes later. The pediatrician sent the mom home with fluids and instructed her to continue throughout that night to give him liquids and if he didn't get better to take him to the hospital the next morning. Praise be to God about 8:30 the next morning the mom and her little boy showed up at our clinic and he was doing much better and the mom came to tell the doctor and say thank you. It was neat to see some follow up because the majority of the week the the doctors see the patient give them anywhere from 3 to 6 medications and off they go.
About to go on an motorcycle adventure around Port Au Prince, so until next time.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Heavy Heart
Our first full day in Haiti was spent at the compound. This is abnormal seeing as how we usually are painting or doing heavy construction work. For the entire day Katy and I worked with some members on a team from New Jersey. They brought down almost 100 laptops and were installing software on each of them so that they have basic programs, tutorials on how to use them, and Rosetta Stone. The school lunchroom is where we set up shop and downloaded away! From about 10 to 1 chitter chatter filled the room. Kids were so curious about the computers, any chance they got they would sneak back and take a peep before they were scolded by their teacher. The day looked very different than most days in Haiti but it was neat to see a different side of making an impact. Education and especially English are very valuable in Haiti. We were giving them in a very small way hope and a future. This is what I live to be a part of, something greater than myself!
After dinner that night I walked down stairs to spend time with the Pierre's, a sweet family that lives below us at the compound. There are 2 girls about my age that I love spending time with, Yslande and Jean Darling. During clean up I took dishes downstairs and I know that the girls wash them. My desire is to live life with the Haitian people just as I would with my friends and those I care about at home. So off to washing Yslande and I went. Washing dishes in Haiti as you can imagine is VERY different but I loved it! While washing them I learned 4 Creole words (yes 4 was my max!) and she taught me a worship song! Such a moment of great joy because this was a small piece of what heaven will look like. all the saints praising God together no matter where they are from or what color their skin. Oh how I long for heaven!
Today we joined the team at construction sites. Roofing was the main objective; however, since we had extra hands the girls got to love on the children. Today I held a 1 month old that has increased tone throughout her entire body, a 6 month old that I will tell you more about in a moment, and 2 sweet little girls. One girl about 3 years old fell asleep in my arms. Precious. And I danced with quite a few more children. I spun them around in circles and told the, they are princesses because I wanted them to know that they are princesses of the Most High King!
Now back to the 6 month old. This was a little boy with just a dress on. Yep a boy in a dress. Itsall they had. While holding him I did learn a Haitian wives tale. If a little boy urinates on you it's good luck and if a little girl urinates on you it's bad luck. Well thankfully no one urinated on me and so apparently I have no luck and I'm quite okay with that:) Now for the reason I have a heavy heart. This sweet little boy's mom through translator asked if she could sell him to me. WHAT? I mean you hear of things like this happening but still I didn't believe this actually happens. The mom went on to explain that the child's father was no where to be found, her mother died in the earthquake, she doesn't have a job, she isn't educated, she's hungry and so is her child. Like I said earlier I've heard stories such as these but experience this in real life will permanently change me. The translator said that she is one of many in Haiti like this. And yes my heart is for Haiti, but I'd be crazy to think that it was just here, y'all its all over the world. People in such need and poverty that they can only feed their infants once a day simply because they aren't nourished enough to produce more breastmilk. Of course I told this mom I wouldn't buy her baby and that she should never sell him, but that I would pray and as God to provide for her and her son. I reminded her of the truth from God's word that says "ask and you shall receive whatever you need." I fully believe in this truth. Please join me in this prayer. For this particular mom and all the others in the world in her same position.
I'll leave you with this thought which I also gathered from the New Jersey team's devotion our first night.
How are you using your position of privilege to help others?
My first thought was the privilege of all the stuff we have. Then of course there is the privilege of simply being born in America. BUT our true privilges as believers is the salvation, and through that, the grace of God in our lives. So what about you? How are you using your privilges to help others? If you can't answer that question I challenge you to make a resolution as to how to answer it and see the impact it will make in your life!
After dinner that night I walked down stairs to spend time with the Pierre's, a sweet family that lives below us at the compound. There are 2 girls about my age that I love spending time with, Yslande and Jean Darling. During clean up I took dishes downstairs and I know that the girls wash them. My desire is to live life with the Haitian people just as I would with my friends and those I care about at home. So off to washing Yslande and I went. Washing dishes in Haiti as you can imagine is VERY different but I loved it! While washing them I learned 4 Creole words (yes 4 was my max!) and she taught me a worship song! Such a moment of great joy because this was a small piece of what heaven will look like. all the saints praising God together no matter where they are from or what color their skin. Oh how I long for heaven!
Today we joined the team at construction sites. Roofing was the main objective; however, since we had extra hands the girls got to love on the children. Today I held a 1 month old that has increased tone throughout her entire body, a 6 month old that I will tell you more about in a moment, and 2 sweet little girls. One girl about 3 years old fell asleep in my arms. Precious. And I danced with quite a few more children. I spun them around in circles and told the, they are princesses because I wanted them to know that they are princesses of the Most High King!
Now back to the 6 month old. This was a little boy with just a dress on. Yep a boy in a dress. Itsall they had. While holding him I did learn a Haitian wives tale. If a little boy urinates on you it's good luck and if a little girl urinates on you it's bad luck. Well thankfully no one urinated on me and so apparently I have no luck and I'm quite okay with that:) Now for the reason I have a heavy heart. This sweet little boy's mom through translator asked if she could sell him to me. WHAT? I mean you hear of things like this happening but still I didn't believe this actually happens. The mom went on to explain that the child's father was no where to be found, her mother died in the earthquake, she doesn't have a job, she isn't educated, she's hungry and so is her child. Like I said earlier I've heard stories such as these but experience this in real life will permanently change me. The translator said that she is one of many in Haiti like this. And yes my heart is for Haiti, but I'd be crazy to think that it was just here, y'all its all over the world. People in such need and poverty that they can only feed their infants once a day simply because they aren't nourished enough to produce more breastmilk. Of course I told this mom I wouldn't buy her baby and that she should never sell him, but that I would pray and as God to provide for her and her son. I reminded her of the truth from God's word that says "ask and you shall receive whatever you need." I fully believe in this truth. Please join me in this prayer. For this particular mom and all the others in the world in her same position.
I'll leave you with this thought which I also gathered from the New Jersey team's devotion our first night.
How are you using your position of privilege to help others?
My first thought was the privilege of all the stuff we have. Then of course there is the privilege of simply being born in America. BUT our true privilges as believers is the salvation, and through that, the grace of God in our lives. So what about you? How are you using your privilges to help others? If you can't answer that question I challenge you to make a resolution as to how to answer it and see the impact it will make in your life!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Happy Happy Joy Joy
Those words practically sum up me today. I'm beyond excited to be back on Haiti. I love this place! As the plane landed I was repeating to myself "I'm in Haiti! I'm in Haiti! I'm in Haiti!" (in my head of course). It has been far to long since I have been in this place that I love so much!
For some humor and to tell you how terrible I am at packing, I have a little story. To preface this story I must say that I've spent the past 6 days between 3 cities and living out of 6 bags. I was standing in airport security and thinking through what I brought. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks, of all things in the world to forget on such a trip as this, I forgot both my Bible and journal. Major uh-oh! But praise God that He sent the Holy Spirit that lives within me and counsels me from day to day! I also have a feeling I will be very thankful for the scriptures I have hidden in my heart throughout my life during this trip! As for a journal, Haiti thankfully has paper and maybe I'll get lucky and find a spare Bible!
The last trip I made down was in October 2010, so in a year LOTS has changed. The airport actually has a decorated covering where you walk to meet the people picking you up. There are colorful signs that welcome you to Haiti. So far we've had different tap tap drivers. Part of one main road that we travel has actually been filled with bricks and the road is actually smooth (which is rarely in Haiti). The staff at HOM (Haiti Outreach Ministries) has changed. The compound we stay in has changed. The major change we have noticed is less tents lining the streets as you drive through town! Now dont get me wrong, tents still exist but in a smaller quantity! Praise God! But with all of these changes I see progress in this nation. So exciting to see people no longer living under cloth and canvas but rather brick that can shield then from the scorching heat and pouring rain.
One thing that hasn't changed is the people. They are beautiful! The children are precious! Clinging to you and asking for your name along with a balloon of some chocolate of course. As we arrived at the compound children surrounded us, speaking LOTS of Creole which might as well be jibberish to me. They touch our skin, they ask our names, and are excited to see us! So welcoming! We've also been able to see some of our friends both young and old women who live within the compound. One of the sweet ladies even gave us a little rice and beans which I was excited about. There is nothing in the world like Haitian rice and beans. They are soooooo good!
Katy and I are about to go meet with the medical director for HOM for the first time. We're super excited about how the Lord's going to show up on this trip and make His will and plans known to us! Please pray for our hearts and ears to be constantly open to all that He has to speak to us!
Blessings to y'all from Haiti!
For some humor and to tell you how terrible I am at packing, I have a little story. To preface this story I must say that I've spent the past 6 days between 3 cities and living out of 6 bags. I was standing in airport security and thinking through what I brought. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks, of all things in the world to forget on such a trip as this, I forgot both my Bible and journal. Major uh-oh! But praise God that He sent the Holy Spirit that lives within me and counsels me from day to day! I also have a feeling I will be very thankful for the scriptures I have hidden in my heart throughout my life during this trip! As for a journal, Haiti thankfully has paper and maybe I'll get lucky and find a spare Bible!
The last trip I made down was in October 2010, so in a year LOTS has changed. The airport actually has a decorated covering where you walk to meet the people picking you up. There are colorful signs that welcome you to Haiti. So far we've had different tap tap drivers. Part of one main road that we travel has actually been filled with bricks and the road is actually smooth (which is rarely in Haiti). The staff at HOM (Haiti Outreach Ministries) has changed. The compound we stay in has changed. The major change we have noticed is less tents lining the streets as you drive through town! Now dont get me wrong, tents still exist but in a smaller quantity! Praise God! But with all of these changes I see progress in this nation. So exciting to see people no longer living under cloth and canvas but rather brick that can shield then from the scorching heat and pouring rain.
One thing that hasn't changed is the people. They are beautiful! The children are precious! Clinging to you and asking for your name along with a balloon of some chocolate of course. As we arrived at the compound children surrounded us, speaking LOTS of Creole which might as well be jibberish to me. They touch our skin, they ask our names, and are excited to see us! So welcoming! We've also been able to see some of our friends both young and old women who live within the compound. One of the sweet ladies even gave us a little rice and beans which I was excited about. There is nothing in the world like Haitian rice and beans. They are soooooo good!
Katy and I are about to go meet with the medical director for HOM for the first time. We're super excited about how the Lord's going to show up on this trip and make His will and plans known to us! Please pray for our hearts and ears to be constantly open to all that He has to speak to us!
Blessings to y'all from Haiti!
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Family Vacay
Since I began college, my parents have taken my sister and I on a vacation each year at Christmas. My mom says she kidnaps us so that my parents can see us rather than us spending the break running around with friends. I must say she is quite clever and we sure don't complain!
This years destination was Treasure Cay on the Grand Abaco Island in the Bahamas. Yep, that's a lot of words. Needless to say, it was AWESOME. Treasure Cay was very secluded. Only a few restaurants, but in my opinion, the world's most BEAUTIFUL water.
The week was filled with long walks on the beach, major relaxation time, and LOTS of reading (particularly because it was cold two days). While I'm on the book subject. I have 2 MUST READS! The first being Choosing to SEE by Mary Beth Chapman and Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis. Both of these incredible women are Nashville natives. I guess I was raised in a great place, although I'm still partial to Birmingham! If you were buying the books from me I would put a money-back guarantee on them, I'm just that confident you will love them! Check them out.
The last two days we had some Fun in the Sun! Out to the ocean we went. First we stopped for a little bit of fishing. We caught some Snapper, Yellow tail, and a Sucker fish. That night we ate our "catches of the day". DELISH! Pics are below but I must tell you about the dead gum sucker fish! I waited for at least 30 minutes to get him. He was about 2 feet below the surface and circled at the bait nibbling forever, BUT, nonetheless, I finally snagged him!
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Sucker Fish
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| Snapper |
The next day my dad, sister, and I went scuba diving. This is a hobby that we have all newly acquired within the last few years. Adrienne and I got certified in August, so it was fun to take our first official dives. During our two dives I was in awe of God's creation. To think about the intricate geometric shapes of every coral reef and the color of the fish just testifies to the fact that our God cares about the details! And if He cares about the details 60 feet below the sea, how much more does He care about the details of each of our lives.
My sweet family the last night at dinner
Next stop: Haiti!
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Dreams really do come true!
A chapter has ended and only the Lord knows what's next! Honestly, that brings both fear and excitement to me. Fear because I'm naturally a control freak (praise God He's refining that part of me) and excitement because my prayers are being answered. My prayer being that He write the story of my life and that my one small life brings Him LOTS of glory!
A lot has changed in my life since the beginning on November. I completed my internship in Los Angeles, returned to the south (a place of comfort for me), studied and -praise the Lord- passed the hardest test of my life, spent a month in Birmingham (a place I like to call my home), graduated from graduate school, and then moved back to Nashville until I find a job.
These changes have been smooth, much to my surprise. If you asked my mother, I DON'T like change; BUT, the Lord has been so gracious to me through all of this.
Now that I've wandered off from the point of this post, so let's get back to the first sentence....a chapter ended. I will no longer have the role (yes, all my OT friends will like that use of the word) of being a student. As graduation approached, many people said congratulations, I'm or we're so proud of you. To tell you the truth I appreciated their kind words, but kind of laughed. You see, the way I looked at it, I was just glad to be done! I will be "proud" of myself when the Lord is glorified by my life in far greater ways than earning a Masters degree.
During my graduation ceremony, the Lord spoke so sweetly to me. He said Tori this is a DREAM COME TRUE. I sat there in awe and amazed. That was so true. As a reflected, I remembered the night I decided (at this point I didn't recognize this as a calling of the Lord on my life, but merely a career decision I myself made-praise Him again for changing my perspective!). In 10th grade, I sat in my best friends living room floor and was talking to her mom. I told Mrs. Babbi that I wanted to work with children with special needs (yes OT friends you are once again welcome for my proper usage of "person first" language- I think Linda would be proud!). Since she was a speech pathologist and had worked with them, I asked her what my options were. She told me speech pathologist, special education teacher, and occupational therapist. After some discussion (which I won't bore you with) I decided I wanted to be an occupational therapist!
From that moment on, I never changed my mind about what I wanted to "be". This makes me laugh because now as the Lord has dramatically changed me heart, I know that I will "be"/am much,much more than the profession I have chosen! Anywho, it amazes me that I have never changed my mind. I am a very indecisive person. I cant even decide what to wear to dinner with friends, much less a profession. But praise the Lord he is greater than my indecision!
Graduation was a sweet, sweet day. One chapter closed but the Lord reminded me that He has so faithfully carried me through the past 8 years and that He has even GREATER things in store for the next 8! I have great expectation and confidence in what He has before me. Now, I have the opportunity to as Psalm 27:14 says "Wait for the Lord, be strong, and let your heart take courage, wait for the Lord!" As I opened my bible to to find this verse, which has been on my heart for a while, next to it I had written provision for 2012. I'm not sure when this was written, but AMEN to the Lord so faithfully providing!
A lot has changed in my life since the beginning on November. I completed my internship in Los Angeles, returned to the south (a place of comfort for me), studied and -praise the Lord- passed the hardest test of my life, spent a month in Birmingham (a place I like to call my home), graduated from graduate school, and then moved back to Nashville until I find a job.
These changes have been smooth, much to my surprise. If you asked my mother, I DON'T like change; BUT, the Lord has been so gracious to me through all of this.
Now that I've wandered off from the point of this post, so let's get back to the first sentence....a chapter ended. I will no longer have the role (yes, all my OT friends will like that use of the word) of being a student. As graduation approached, many people said congratulations, I'm or we're so proud of you. To tell you the truth I appreciated their kind words, but kind of laughed. You see, the way I looked at it, I was just glad to be done! I will be "proud" of myself when the Lord is glorified by my life in far greater ways than earning a Masters degree.
During my graduation ceremony, the Lord spoke so sweetly to me. He said Tori this is a DREAM COME TRUE. I sat there in awe and amazed. That was so true. As a reflected, I remembered the night I decided (at this point I didn't recognize this as a calling of the Lord on my life, but merely a career decision I myself made-praise Him again for changing my perspective!). In 10th grade, I sat in my best friends living room floor and was talking to her mom. I told Mrs. Babbi that I wanted to work with children with special needs (yes OT friends you are once again welcome for my proper usage of "person first" language- I think Linda would be proud!). Since she was a speech pathologist and had worked with them, I asked her what my options were. She told me speech pathologist, special education teacher, and occupational therapist. After some discussion (which I won't bore you with) I decided I wanted to be an occupational therapist!
From that moment on, I never changed my mind about what I wanted to "be". This makes me laugh because now as the Lord has dramatically changed me heart, I know that I will "be"/am much,much more than the profession I have chosen! Anywho, it amazes me that I have never changed my mind. I am a very indecisive person. I cant even decide what to wear to dinner with friends, much less a profession. But praise the Lord he is greater than my indecision!
Graduation was a sweet, sweet day. One chapter closed but the Lord reminded me that He has so faithfully carried me through the past 8 years and that He has even GREATER things in store for the next 8! I have great expectation and confidence in what He has before me. Now, I have the opportunity to as Psalm 27:14 says "Wait for the Lord, be strong, and let your heart take courage, wait for the Lord!" As I opened my bible to to find this verse, which has been on my heart for a while, next to it I had written provision for 2012. I'm not sure when this was written, but AMEN to the Lord so faithfully providing!
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