I miss it!

If you know me and where I spent that past 2 1/2 weeks you will know where IT is, but in case you need help: HAITI! I literally miss everything about it. Since I've been back in the US I've been able to spend a weekend with my sweet college friends, go to an engagement party of one of my old/soon to be new roommates, went to a super bowl party, interviewed and have been offered a job, and gone home to Brentwood to see my family and especially my sweet Granny who had surgery while I was in Haiti. It's been wonderful, but I still love Haiti and my heart is still there!

After getting to my car in Atlanta to go to the mountains with my friends, I had a strange feeling for the first time in my life. I've been to Haiti 4 times now, but this time coming home was different. Driving through downtown Atlanta and seeing all the skyscrapers, millions of lights, and all the stuff in America, I felt like a foreigner. Many of you are wondering how I could feel like a foreigner in the country of my birth, it baffled me too. But really it just confirmed in my heart (once again) that the nation of Haiti will play a huge role in my future. My heart delights in this reality and is expectant of the Lords timing and beauty of what that will look like. I yearn for Him alone to orchestrate this!

Now back to what I miss! Well, besides everything, I'll list a few. I miss waking up to 200 kids singing praises to God in Creole. I miss sleeping under a mosquito net on an air mattress! Crazy, I know! But seriously I slept better in Haiti than I did the first 3 nights I was in America! I miss The Pierre family. This was the sweet family that lived below us in the compound. Alot of nights I went downstairs and visited with the kids and parents. I did dishes with Yslande, played on the iPad with Woodley (he was really good at angry birds, playing every rap song in my music-which wasn't many!, loved photo booth, and finding the We are the World song that was recorded by many artists in America after the earthquake), skipped with Darling, and learned creole from Pierre and his wife. I miss holding all the little children. I miss dancing with them. I miss painting there nails and telling them they are beautiful. I miss them touching my hair and skin out of curiosity. I miss them braiding my hair and running up to me with such joy and excitement. I miss the community that I found out the compound where we stayed. Three different groups of people besides ourselves were working with HOM while we stayed. Being in community with other believers that we're like minded blessed me so much. To hear of their life stories, their walks with God, to glean wisdom from many of them, to see theie hard work and dedication, to watch Jesus shine through them and use them to bless those around them, blessed me. To see people my age and younger committing months of there lives to serve God encouraged me. I miss the bumpy roads. I miss rice and beans. Weird I know. But seriously, I like them and might have to learn how to cook a little like the Haitians. I miss the sunshine, the sunsets, and the one sunrise I woke up early enough to watch. I miss being exposed to the reality of how the Haitians live. This reality kept me constantly praying and seeking the goodness of the Lord to come and reign. I pleaded with God to be exactly who He says He is in His word. Knowing that He is faithful and sovereign. I miss my heart being broken for the children of God I saw around me. More than ever before I feel that this trip my heart was broken for what breaks His. But in that brokenness it lead me to recall the greatness of Him the Maker and Creator of all things!

Being back in America has been a harder transition than ever before. Like I said, makes no sense because I've busy visiting with people I love and care for, but my heart yearns to be in Haiti. I truly feel like it's a place I can call home. Wrestling with this isnt easy, but it's good. Because God has been and will continue to be so faithful to walk me through this transition. He has reminded me that since Friday He has me in the US until He calls me elsewhere. So today I am called to live in this society, to love the people here with every bit of who I am, to serve Him in America, to listen and seek Him the exact same, to trust Him for provision and wisdom, and to let my little light shine today exactly where He has me.....but that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to miss Haiti!